Gratitude Wednesday

I'm grateful for....

1) Our constant journey together and solving the forever hoping for perfection but okay with mistakes

2) Moma's retirement party- and the poem I'll do just for her

3) Seeing family & friends this weekend-I always seem to miss them more right before I see them

4) New poems!- To be posted tomorrow

5) Good grades on papers and exams I'm glad I did as well as I did

6) Being interviewed and recognized by the Txstate news paper for my poetry (I'll try an post it Friday)

7) July 7, 2007

8) A New JOB to start on the 12th (Things only to get better and not worse)

9) Plucker Thursdays with the both of you

10) My Creator-Thank you!

Bonus: Baybid's impression of 3Times...truly HILARIOUS!

Weekend Report

Friday

I awoke to thank you Lord's and opened books-Shakespeare is a mother. I ran a few errands, ate some breakfast tacos from a little Spanish spot on Oltorf, then headed to my interview. It is actually my second and I feel that I did very well-no worries confident as I should I expect to hear from them by next week for sure. It's Angel's Birthday! I thought about her and how much money she may have won-could you donate to the Wedding Fund? (Lol) I later continued to read and catch up on my assignments. Talked to Kimmie-man I should've went with you to SA because we did what? Absolutely Nothing! David and I had to work it out & get back on track (thank you for the peace offering). I talked to Z who calmed me a bit and things were okay again. I cooked spaghetti...and read Shakespeare to sleep....

Saturday

I awoke to David's kisses goodbye as he traveled to San Marcos for a Mason meeting-why the hell do you have a suit (Lol). I got up and got right into my books, knowing that my distraction would be wanting to hang with Baybid today. He came back and fixed me breakfast, cleaned up a little, and we headed to the track. I myself did not run on it, but I did sit in the truck and feel the breeze as I read more of Shakespeare and watched Baybid blow the wind in my hair. Once done we headed to Round Rock and I met his cousin Andrea who lives in Florida. A pregnant one she is cute! More normal than the the others-smile. We chilled over there for awhile, but we can only stand so much so we headed back down south to walk the Barton Creek mall. I myself was looking to buy some shoes since I forgot that one of my gift cards for Christmas was for Payless! Nothing there though. We shared pretzels, laughter, and hands. Later we caught a movie: Daddy's Little Girl. It was really good-much better than the Ghost Rider we saw last week. I just love the QT either way. Writing in my journal and furthermore reciting poetry...for my mom's retirement party this weekend, the slam(s) Tuesday & Wednesday, and just for my peace of mind. So now I lay me down to sleep, cuddle in his arms-feel safe enough to weep...

Sunday

Seemed like it was going to be a long weekend at first but in actuality it wasn't! I once again awoke to thank you Lordies and Shakespeare (Othello by the way). I searched the web, wrote a proposal for a class, and worked on my poetry. We drove to the Greenbelt and walked the trail. David and I were stereo-typed he is a NFL player and I'm a video hoe (just not in those exact words). WHATEVA! We took pictures-Tee we need ya let us know when you can take them...? And KayDee we may need some help with the website...? Enjoying the breeze from there we went to the fitness center to work out-I've actually been slippin, gotta catch up with Auntie (smile). It went well though, just gotta stay consistent. I talked to my mom always more than enough....I love you. I went to the Business Center to print out assignments and a picture of a dress for my sister to wear in the wedding-which I think will look awesome on her! Hell I hope she lets me borrow it (Lol). David cooked Talapia and we (more like I) watched the Oscar's and waited on the phone call from Angel-where you at!? In the mean time I'll work on my blog, American Sign Language, and fallin asleep....

HAPPY BIRTHDAY ANGEL!

Thank you for always being a good friend and sister

For checking out books for me to further my education

For your wisdom and smile

We love you!

Win BIG!

Also, I mentioned in my Weekend Report last week that one of my friends sounded down when we were on the phone. So I decided to write a poem to her-just for you:

I heard tears in her voice,

with swallowed back pain in her throat.

I hung at the gloom of her face,

imagining that your heart hurt...

so mine did too.

To my friend-I ask of you,

Questioning what is it that you need for me to do?

I may not can fix it,

But I swear I'd try if you'd let me.

Confide in my touch...

Offering my t-shirt as Kleenex,

my shoulder as comfort.

Adding my spirit into yours,

transforming confusion-

Living with our mistakes,

Heal with me.

And I know your closer to her than me,

but I'm no stranger to loving you just as much.

I too place pedestals before your feet...

hoping that when your ready-and realize your worth

you'll step on it for me to view you better.

Save those locks for me to identify distinguished beauty,

Prolific poetry

And engaged friendship.

Grow with me.

I saw her grin smile,

with unbalanced happiness hiding behind her teeth.

She breathed confidence & insecurity at the same time-

you have to know her in order to see her this way.

Traveling down highways,

mirroring life the way its composed,

guiding her into our bridge of friendship...

Where I pretend that she will never have bad days-

And still produces rainbows after the rain.

Until the next storm hits,

Coast with me.

ebstewart,2006
sweated techniquespublishing
all rights reserved

Late & Still Grateful

for....

1) Him kissing my feet in loving gestures

2) Him and Her in the crowd with them as I featured

3) Her home cooking, kisses, and constant financial support (thank you paying on my dress)

4) Me rocking the hell out of the slam and getting it all on DVD (by my Spike Lee)

5) Promises from you that I hope you keep (please don't let me down)

6) Ordering my dress-and being so nervous about how he'll think it looks on that day

7) July 7, 2007

8) My family, friends-you mean more to me than you know

9) Job interviews on Friday! & Patience to deal with unruly children and ignorant parents while subbing!

10) My Creator and savior of my world-please continue to bless me

Bonus: Thoughts of my first dance with my father EVER in life on the day that I am no longer his last name-Thoughts of kissing you for the first time EVER as Mrs. Braswell-Thoughts of my mom walking me down the aisle into your arms (she gives this woman that she made away)-Thoughts of me being at my most vulnerable state and being okay with displaying that to the world.

Weekend Report

Friday

Pop tarts with milk for breakfast on my way to Oak Springs Elementary to finish my subbing assignment (I was there on Wednesday and it was actually easy because the kids had a Valentines party that day). But today! No party just unruly children! They know me because they've had me as a sub before...so what do we know about Miss. Ebony? "She don't play!" says Xavier...and I'm so for real about it. I kicked a few out of my room the first half-get the principals and parents involved because most parents don't like to be called about their child acting up at school. Second half of the day was actually easy! They worked hard for me so they could have free time at the end of the day-able to talk and play for about 30min. Staff walked in and told me that I'm a really good teacher and that I had them under such control-that made me feel good. Got off and headed to the salon, let Dora hook me up (thanks D!), talked to my friend some (after playing phone tag a bit)-I heard tears in her eyes and voice, never found out what was wrong, but I will say that I was worried about you and I hope that things are okay...I know it just be that way sometimes. On the road with Baybid headed to Byt. Heaven lies in the arms of my mother, she is so what I need at times. We hung out and talked. She cooked spaghetti and green beans w/corn bread (but I don't eat corn bread-so David got down). Fell asleep to the Cosby show it's good to be home...

Saturday

Wake up moma! We have to go to Mon Cheri bridal to try on gowns! I manged to get some reading done, and David spoke to Q from Iraq (he was happy to hear your voice-we miss you). Riding with her always takes me back to my adolescents and how fast she used to drive trying to get me everywhere on time because she's always running late. We arrived and they got me started with the two dresses that I had narrowed them down to. I tried on the first one (the less expensive out of the two) looked in the mirror....but wasn't sure. Put on the second one (the one that I knew my mom would flip out about the price)...both they had to pin on me and clamp me in because of the size difference (10 & 12). Still I asked my mom which one she liked better, because it was such a hard decision for me. She didn't wanna say, but in her own way said that the more expensive one was definitely more me! And I'm not the girly girl type, but I do like the bling! Take this off, put that back on, try on the veil, place the tiara on top, look in the mirror and that one was the one! WE ORDERED MY GOWN!!! MY MOM PAID HALF DOWN AND I WAS THANKFUL FOR HER AND ALL THAT SHE'S EVER DONE-AND CONTINUE TO DO (I LOVE YOU). She, my sister, David, and Kimmie was right-everything did workout with the dress situation. We headed back home, but stoped by Valda's (my cousin whose always upset if I don't see her when I come home)...I told David of my gown, but he doesn't want the details, he wants to be surprised-so no real discussion took place about the gown. All three of us headed to Target & Wal-Mart to pickup a few things to cook. I am sometimes jealous of people who are the same age as me who walk up and hug my Alice! As if they could ever love her more than I do-get outta here! I walked around running poems in my head, my featured night was like 4 hours away. Got back to the apt and I stayed in the car to finish my practice. Got dressed and practiced, then headed to the event. It was a great experience! The crowd was kinda-no the crowd WAS dead, no blame placed fully I knew they had never witnessed a real Slam before. Some of my family represented, my best friend Jennifer showed up, and of course my mom & David thought I did very well. I got feedback and everyone thought that I was awesome-I was just glad that I was given the opportunity. They presented me with a bag of goodies and the check is in the mail-so YEP it went well. I got feedback from other poets there, and they wanted me to give them feedback on how they could do better. I invited them to Neo-Soul during Spring Break-so they could see the real deal! All in all, I kept it moving! And I'm glad that Neo-Soul and friends have encouraged me and keep making me a better poet. Back at the apt my mom talked about how good she thought I did and how much I inspired those that were there...I fell asleep on the floor to her voice....

Sunday

Holaluya Holla Back (LMAO)! We went to church and I sat between the two most important people in my life. Many asked about the show or told me that they enjoyed it. I talked to the pastor to make sure our wedding date was reserved to use the church. I didn't get to the cake, but I have some time for that. My mom cooked me into a comma with her smothered pork chops, rice and gravy, with beans and mustard greens on the side! You have no idea! Dang if I could get home cooked food from her on the daily I'd be such a nicer person (smile). I woke up to The Wedding Planner and David working on his business, my mom holding convo with my aunts. Baybid and I went for ice-cream then to the movies. Long talks before the movie-I want to marry you because game...the movie was OK, but should have been a matinee. I stayed up talking to my mom about school, got comfort from David, then fell asleep as the babygirl in my mom's bed-afraid to move because any move you make wakes her. Thank you Lord for this comfort (and for always making a way even if I didn't see it before).... I didn't get to see my Pizza or my Ky. She's sick and he's working crazy hours at the plant. I did get to see all my little cousins-walk it out! I love ya'll no doubt. I miss you all dearly, and it's always good to come home.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MY HAMBONE "KLARK KENT" THOMAS!

I love you so much